When 'No' Just Means Ask a Better Question

As I sit on hold with the City of Bangor to ask a question about licensing a new business, I’ve got a podcast playing in the background—My First Million with Sam Parr (Sam) and Shaan Puri (Shaan). This episode features Elan Lee (Elan), co-creator of Exploding Kittens and an absolute force in the game world, and it’s quickly become one of my favorite entrepreneurial podcasts.

Elan shared how every few seconds, someone buys one of their games. Not just that—they’re holding multiple spots on the list of the top five best-selling games in the world. Wild. But the part that really hit me was when he said he doesn’t take “no” for an answer. To him, “no” just means you need to ask a different question.

AHHH YES. That’s it.

I’m deep into writing a business plan right now and got a no I really didn’t want. But instead of packing it in, I went back to my mentor and asked: what am I doing wrong? I didn’t want “no” to be the final answer. He gave me new insight, new perspective—just enough to tweak the question. And that small shift might be what gets the door to open.

There’s almost always a way forward—but 99% of the time, it’s not some obvious, step-by-step thing like a Lego instruction manual. I’ve filled notebooks with ideas—some went nowhere, others just hit temporary dead ends. But maybe, just maybe, if this current idea doesn’t pan out, I can go back, dust off an old one, and try asking a new question.

I’m so grateful for this podcast—it's the fuel keeping me hustling and it’s about grit, curiosity, and relentless problem-solving. I actually enjoy the mental cat-and-mouse game of trying to build something from nothing. From no network to new mentors on speed dial. I’m lucky that one of them picks up when I call. He never gives me the answer—he helps me find it. And that, to me, is everything.

Keep showing up, keep asking better questions—and don’t stop until the story you’re writing is one you’re proud to tell.